On Sunday morning, I sat down in my comfy office chair to meditate. I noticed I felt alone, so I stopped meditating and concentrated on the physical sensations in my chest and throat. So far, so good. But then I remembered feeling alone as a kid. I wondered what was underneath it. Tried to figure out what it meant. Within minutes, everything in my office felt like it was behind glass. My partner walked by and seemed like a complete stranger. That's dissociation. It’s zero fun

Our overthinking, analytic mind doesn’t like some of our ideas. The quiet ones. Whispers. Nudges. It rejects them so quickly, they don’t make it into our conscious awareness. We’re more likely to notice the resistance: I can’t do that. Not now. That makes no sense. No way. But the quiet thoughts we reject can be the most powerful ones we ever have. One summer, while sitting at my desk editing an article, with a window open to catch a late July breeze, this quietly popped into

Your history of not-so-great relationships doesn't mean your picker's broken. You just need to fix your filter. Let me explain. You choose potential partners based on a filter. An mental and emotional checklist. The problem? You do it unconsciously based on: Chemistry What feels familiar What you saw at home, in movies, online, and on TV What you don't want to repeat Not on what's most important to you. Here's how that played out in my life: After my first marriage ended, I s

I've been creating two things for you. The first is an online quiz that helps you identify your specific overthinking pattern. If you've been following me on IG or Threads, or if you've been reading my newsletter for a while, you probably already have a sense of how your mind gets stuck. The quiz offers deeper insight into your particular pattern. It provides you with a concrete first step to take in the moment. This goes beyond just trying to "stop thinking." You can take it

I started journaling when I was 10 or 11. My dad gave me a leather-bound planner with blank pages he didn’t want. Now Staples are my staples. $2.99 for 100 pages. Even though Office Depot has prettier composition notebooks, Staples is on the way to the grocery store. I covet Moleskine notebooks but they're spendy. I'd feel like every word had to count--which defeats the purpose, as you'll see. The wisdom of writing I've journaled most of my life. Not every day and not regular