How to stop overthinking

Overthinking is a self-sustaining loop of repeating negative thoughts and feelings. It can start with a negative thought--your brain then sends stress hormones throughout your body to create the uncomfortable feelings that go with overthinking.

Or you may feel slightly anxious from having too much caffeine on board or just because you tend toward anxiety (hello, friend!). Your brain will then come up with a negative thought to attach to the feeling.

(Your brain likes to attach feelings to unrelated things. As in you're worried about one thing and then you're worried about a lot of things.

I think of this as like stepping in dog poop. The feeling is the poop--it ends up on everything.)

And, BOOM, you're off to the races in your mind.

Most strategies to stop overthinking address only the thought side of the cycle.

But, to stop overthinking, you need to address both at the same time. You need to both think and feel different things.

Step one. Memorize something that brings your emotional level up out of the stress, fear, and anxiety of overthinking. It can be a poem, prayer, psalm, or passage of text.

Choosing something long-ish (~200 words) is best because it takes some mental effort to remember it. However, if you have attention or memory issues, something shorter is good. Like this one:

It's from a lovely PDF of the words 80+ people on Threads use.

Step two.

As soon as you realize you're overthinking, start reciting your memorized words. Slowly and silently. It's better to do it somewhere quieter. Closing your eyes may be helpful (unless you're driving, then closing your eyes is especially not helpful).

You can do this anywhere, anytime, and no one will be the wiser.

I also like to use mine as a chant when I'm walking. I find a cadence of words and footsteps that feels rhythmic and unforced--usually about one syllable every other step.

I use it if I wake up in the middle of the night and have trouble getting back to sleep, too.

Step three.

Keep at it as long as you need to. Typically, when you're just beginning this practice, you might need to repeat the whole thing a few times.

Your mind will pull you back onto the overthinking/overfeeling train. Totally normal -- just notice and go back to reciting.

You'll know when it's enough. The grip on your brain will loosen and you'll feel less tension in your body. You'll be able to take a deep breath again.

Step four.

Repeat whenever you notice you're overthinking. Around the time I learned this, I was going through SOME THINGS in my life. Many days, I repeated it 25-30 times between getting up in the morning and crawling back under the covers at night.

Here's the thing about repeating it a lot. It beats whatever you were overthinking about hands-down. Einstein said, "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking that created them." A little clarity and space in your brain goes a long way toward solving a problem.

What happens over time

I still use the same words I memorized 15 years ago.

Now, I get about five words in and my shoulders drop. I take a deep breath because I have years and years of experience being soothed by the words I chose. I've literally repeated them thousands of times. Twice just today.

My overthinking is much less intense. I still do it, of course, because I'm human and have a brain, but instead of this:

WHAT IF!! WHAT IF!! WHAT IF!!

it's:

what if

I'll take it.